http://www.bozemandailychronicle.com/articles/2008/08/29/bobcats/football/10bell.txt
Mr. Bell -
At the beginning of this season, when all the quarterback talk in the Media was about who would win the starting spot: Mark Iddins, Mark Desin, or Cody Kempt, Head Coach Rob Ash came out in our first interview of the year, and included your son Darius in that discussion as a dark horse candidate. I didn't see that coming at all, and it intrigued me. I watched Darius over the next few days of practice and liked what I saw. Sure, you could tell he was a freshman with some of the mistakes he made, but I could also see that he was good. Along with being a sports reporter, I am a lifelong and diehard sports fan. Football is my number one sports passion. I had a very good feeling that after a few years under Head Coach Rob Ash and Quarterbacks Coach Jim Svoboda, Darius was going to be one of the best quarterbacks in the Big Sky, and maybe even the country.
So clearly, disappointment was my first response to his leaving. I read the press release from MSU citing "personal reasons" as to his departure, typical sports information department language, so I let it go. Then I learned the details behind Bell's departure from an article by the Bozeman Daily Chronicle's Will Holden I've linked to above. I learned how Darius' decision to leave in fact wasn't his at all, but "primarily" yours and your wife's. I learned how you believe that "at 18 years old, you're not necessarily mature enough to make all of your own decisions yet." I learned how you "just wanted Darius to get an opportunity to highlight his skills." Well... Let's tackle these issues separately.
First about highlighting his skills. After watching nearly every, single practice of fall camp, I can say no doubt, right now, Darius' skills are NOT worthy of more reps. You reference your other son, Khalil, a running back for UCLA, saying "Khalil got the opportunities to develop on the field in practice that we felt Darius wasn't getting". First off, I'll ask, really? In his first training camp? That might be so (I don't know the details), but even if that's true, there's one, specific, BIG difference between Khalil and Darius in the matter of practice reps. Khalil is a running back. Darius is a quarterback. More running backs see more reps on the field than quarterbacks do, and in general, running backs are more ready early in their college careers than quarterbacks are. With MSU's quarterback situation (Coach Ash needing to figure out a starter between three choices), of course the rest of the QBs who are not as good aren't going to see many reps.
Now for the maturity issue. You assume your son is NOT mature enough to make some of his own decisions in life (I take that as meaning the important ones), yet at the same time, you believe he IS mature enough to be THE starting quarterback on Saturdays for Montana State? Really? Something isn't adding up there, Mike. It takes a TON of maturity to pick up a FCS college offense. It takes a TON of maturity to earn the respect of your teammates. It takes a TON of maturity to lead players four years older than yourself onto the football field.
Now, I hear from the article Darius told you he was "disappointed" with his experience at MSU. He obviously had high hopes for his freshman year. Good for him! When I went to Syracuse, I had high hopes of anchoring a certain show at the student TV station my freshman year. Did I get it? Heck no. I wasn't NEARLY good enough yet. Was I disappointed? Heck yes. Did I want to go home or to some other second-rate broadcast journalism school so I could be the best person there? Don't miss this: HECK NO. I stayed, I learned, and I persevered. Just because Darius was disappointed doesn't mean you should have brought him home.
On the other hand, maybe Darius did want to leave. If that's the case, what lesson are you teaching him by pulling him out yourself? Daddy isn't always going to be there for every trouble life throws his way. You say Darius isn't mature enough to make his decisions. Well maturity springs from responsibility. Making your own decisions. Making your own mistakes. If Darius wanted to leave, make him make that decision himself. I would at least respect Darius for that.
Mike, it's time to release your stranglehold on Darius' life. Take a lesson from your son! This quote is from his MySpace page: "God Grant Me The Serenity To Accept The Things I Cannot Change, Courage To Change The Things I Can And Wisdom To Know The Difference". Accept the fact that it's time to let Darius, not Mike, run Darius' life. Encourage your son to be independent and to persevere through life's tough moments. Show some fatherly wisdom without forcing his hand, and maybe, just maybe, he'll grow into the man you want him to be.
Darius - I wish you nothing but the best at junior college. I hope you tear it up and come back to the D-1 scene a few years from now a better player and a better man. God Bless, and good luck!
Sincerely,
Dave Griffiths
~ dave@maxmontana.com
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